Writer's Block

Yes, I am actually going to attempt to write about writer's block. Good idea?.........I guess we'll find out. If at any point in the course of this blog, the phrase "all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy" pops up, then you'll know I've officially pulled a Jack Nicholson, and I would strongly advise you to turn off your computer and run far away. At this moment, my mind is about like the white computer screen staring back at me...... a few scattered words and phrases, but no real concrete or compelling ideas. I wouldn't even attempt to write anything, but I have promised to make myself post something (crap or not) every week. Hopefully more ideas will be forthcoming. For today, I feel like Billy Crystal on "Throw Mama From the Train." If you have never seen this movie, you should go watch it now and then come back............seriously. Now, if you get nothing else from this blog, you have found out about and obscure funny movie you never knew you were missing. So, Billy Crystal plays a writer, and Danny DeVito plays, well, basically an idiot ( does he ever play anything else?). Billy Crystal's character has a chronic case of writer's block. Through almost the entire movie, he is hung up on the first sentence of his next novel: "The night was......" Now, most of us would just choose a word and move on. Any number of words would do just fine........cloudy, misty, damp, foreboding, clear...........But then we would not be thinking like writers. A writer knows that the first sentence can make or break an entire piece. And thus begins the constant battle of the writer to create something new, something original, fresh, something that has never been written before. To grab the audience and pull them into the new world coming to life on the page. This is a rather daunting task, especially when even writers like J.K. Rowling, who is in my opinion one of the most original and gifted writers of our day, is constantly being charged with plagiarism. Slightly discouraging, considering she has literally created an entire new world through the written word. I think writer's block increases ten fold once you have children. This is because all mothers have ADD. We find it impossible to keep our minds on one thing. For instance, the reason I am coming up with nothing to write about at the moment could be owing to the fact that the following items are currently occupying most of my mind's thinking space: my piano recital on Saturday, the fact that I still need to print programs for my piano recital on Saturday, Morgan's first soccer game, the mouse carcass in the backyard that I saw Pippin (my extremely naughty puppy- blogs about him are forthcoming) chewing on in the backyard earlier that I cannot seem to bring myself to go out and pick up, the fact that when Dirk comes home from a long day at work, the first thing I will probably ask him to do is go out and pick up a mouse carcass in the backyard, the fact that everyone else in my neighborhood seems to have mowed their lawn at least five times already, and my own lawn is completely out of control, and has also apparently become a haven for mice, the fact that I am going to have a new baby in FOUR WEEKS, that fact that I am going to be cut open to remove said baby in FOUR WEEKS..........and these are just a few of the thoughts. Sometimes it's hard to get to that magic writing place where I can let all of these other thoughts sort of float above me and zero in on one topic. But, I suppose bakers have their off days when the dough doesn't rise. Tiger has days when he just can't make that final putt. Filmmakers seem to have a lot of off days. This is the only explanation for movies like Mars Attack having ever been made ( I would NOT recommend watching that one and coming back........as mind-numbing as this blog may be, I can promise you Mars Attack is worse- and someone actually was paid money to make it....). Ultimately, I think to be a professional writer, the safest route to go is to be a lyricist. I am always amazed when I look in a C.D. (who even has those anymore?) jacket and find the name of a lyricist under a song in which at least half of the lyrics were "la". I am willing to bet I would settle for a lot less per "la" then some of these "lyricists" are charging. And to write any kind of love song, all you have to do is lump a bunch of cliches together, and you have a hit........"The moon reflecting in your eyes like diamonds, ignites my soul, and suddenly the whole world comes alive........" Move over Sting- I totally missed my calling. Anyway- you get the point. Today is not such a good writing day, which, unfortunately for you, my dear readers, means it will not be such a good reading day. I hope you won't give up on me yet. I know there are more ideas rambling around somewhere in the recesses of my mind just waiting to be put into words. For now, maybe I'll go see about that mouse carcass........You never know what might spark a new idea.......